Archaos's Reviews

[Spoof of the Colossus]

Great Looking, Unfunny

While the art in this movie is fantastic, and the ambiance is nice, the humor is tepid, with bland, unfunny writing and slightly awkward delivery. This feels like what it would be like if Carlos Mencia wrote the script for Shadow of the Colossus.

Doctormario, please continue making excellent animations, but let someone else handle the comedy.

doctormario responds:

I can respect that, but you must understand that a lot of people don't see it that way. Perhaps you should write for me, and we can get everyone on the same page. No joke.
Because what this whole thing has shown me is that nobody knows anything, about anybody, all the time. Not even a little bit.

Thanks for the review

["Tree Of Life"]

Pretty good, but...

I can't help but notice you seem to have no idea how a tree grows. When a seed begins to grow, it doesn't spread roots out above ground which later go (presumably) underground somehow. There is also never a point where the trunk is fully grown but has almost no leaves and almost no branches. When a tree grows from a sapling onward, it always has the proportions of a fully-grown tree, just on a smaller scale.

That being said, you did a decent job with the music video. I'm a big fan of Songs to Wear Pants to.

[Parasite Pals]

Unfunny

I honestly only got halfway through this due to the dearth of humor and the frankly annoying voices. The seemingly retarded male character was almost unintelligible on several occasions. Judging from the fact that all the characters are adorable animals and all the male characters are negatively portrayed, I'm going to guess this was made by a 14 year old girl that works at the humane society. I would suggest getting a variety of different people to do voices, as opposed to just one person talking in various annoying ways.

spiffycartoons responds:

Three different people do the voices, and it was made by a 20 year old who has absolutely nothing to do with the humane society. (But I do own a golden retriever.)

You assume a lot and you know what they say about that. :)

My brand of humor doesn't have to amuse you, and I don't mind if you think my flash is the suckiest out there. - But for your future reviews, a word of advice:

Making inaccurate and frankly, false assumptions about the artist of the flash is childish and rude, especially when a review is only supposed to be critique on the Flash work itself.

I didn't put myself up for critique, just the cartoon.

[- Music in Motion -]

Unique but buggy and sterile

This game has a lot of bugs. In the first level, I stayed at the rightmost part of the screen and got shot up into the air by an appearing block. Then I was able to run on the sky for a long time until I jumped and fell back down.

On the circular level, if I positioned myself in a certain place, the spikes NEVER appeared under me.

On the boss, I lost my last life when I was hit by a seismic wave thing that was at least 15-20 pixels away from me. Nice. I love losing because a game programmer can't do hit collision well.

And, all that was on ONE PLAY-THROUGH.

Aside from that though, there are some really interesting ideas being poorly presented here. I think making a sequel and actually spending some time on polish would be a good idea, so you can show people how your ideas look when not hampered by bugs and an overly-minimalist design.

[A Parting Shot II]

Way to ruin a game

You ruined this game with the retarded five lives crap. Why even have lives?? How antiquated. Don't you realize that more people would play it and rate it higher and BEAT it if you just did away with lives? Having to restart a level is PLENTY punishment for dying. This game went from being very enjoyable to being a frustrating waste of my time. This is the internet. This is newgrounds. Out of all the stuff people could be doing, do you really think they're going to bother replaying a moderately entertaining flash game a dozen times just to beat it? I bet 99 percent of the people that have played your game haven't beaten it.

[Pandemic]

Good but way way way too easy.

2 STEP SOLUTION:

All you need to do is turn off everything in the symptoms group and turn on everything in the transmission group. Then once the world is infected which takes very little time, you can turn the symptoms back on to kill everyone. THAT'S IT.

I really liked this game until i discovered this. When you make the sequel, please make sure to add other gameplay mechanics to counter this incredibly easy loophole such as other obstacles to infection or making turning options off a lot more expensive.